Illustration by Nanda Ormond

Here Are 10 Scenarios Where Taj Burrow Must Do The Impossible

It’s our hypothetical hit list!

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SW: You can only surf one board at one break for the rest of your life. What is it and where?
TB: Probably the new little 5’6 Baby Buggy I got from Mayhem. The thing is so fun. And I would have to say Rabbit Hill. It’s straight out front of my house and has lots of different moods to keep me entertained.

You wake up tomorrow morning and you’re Michel Bourez. Describe your day…
Wake up. Flex. Climb a coconut tree, grab a nut, crack it open and drink the water. Flex. Bang out 180 chin ups and 4000 sit-ups. Go get blown out of perfect reef tubes. Flex. On the way in catch a fish with my bare hands and bite straight into it for lunch. Flex. Do some jiu jitsu in the afternoon followed by a pig on the spit shared with family and friends. Flex. Man, that sounds incredible, I want to be Michel Bourez!

You’re the editor of the New York Times. What’s tomorrow’s headline?
We’ve been brainwashing you since 1851.

You are given a magic phone that can call you when you were 10 years old. What do you say to your younger self?
You only get about 28,000 days on this Earth, make them count.

You can travel through time to share a session with any surfer in history in their prime at any wave in the world. Who you going for a shred with, when and where?
Dane Kealoha at Backdoor would be pretty special. Sharing waves with that guy at perfect Backdoor would be the best thing ever! I was always a huge fan of his tube riding ability, not to mention surfing Backdoor uncrowded would be a treat.

You somehow manage to reach the end of the rainbow, what do you find there?
Jimi Hendrix playing a live gig.

You never learned to surf. Describe your life today?
100 per cent tradie life, like most of my friends here at home.

Walking home from the beach one day you find a suitcase under a bush with $100,000 in it. There’s also a note with no information other than a phone number. What’s your next move?
Take the money, bury it somewhere else for a few years, burn the note, and after a couple years dig it up and enjoy the free life.

You win the Olympic Gold Medal for surfing at the 2020 Tokyo Olympics and return home a mainstream hero. Do you accept your invitation to go on Dancing with the Stars?
Nope.

You have to an address a UN assembly on the state of modern surfing. What’s your opening line?
Does everyone read Surfing World?

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