How To Make A Fully Exo Web Clip

Stuff Made For The Sake Of Making Stuff

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Web clips are the new yo-yos. They’re the new Rubik’s Cube. They’re the new Reebok Pumps, Sony Walkman and hyper-colour t-shirt all rolled into one. If web clips were dolls they’d be Cabbage Patch kids. If they were a TV show they’d be Family Ties. Basically, web clips are the new fad everybody wants to be a part of. And thanks to that electronic metal rectangle that sends all our personal information and nude photos to the Government Men, we are now all capable of shooting, editing and uploading our web clips to a magical virtual world that wouldn’t exist without electricity. But how do you make your web clip stand out when millions of the things appear online every single day? Allow me to educate you on this and other matters of great importance.

1. The hardest thing about making a web clip is finding someone to film you surf. I suggest you give Robbie Warden a call on 0407 925 778. He’s a mad frother with a red beard who’s pretty much up for anything.

2. Once you got your footage in the bag it’s time to get editing. Important note: Surfing all by its lonesome cut to music = extreme boring lameness. Go on a Gif. pinching frenzy, steal some animation, ride a 4’11” shaped by Andrew Doheney and add a little personality to your web clip.

3. Music is important. Not just for web clips but also for life. Going to see a band would totally suck because you’d be paying to watch people standing around. It’s well documented I’ve been on a fanatical Cloacas campaign. Cut any web clip to Cloacas and you’ve already made something better than 99% of everything on the internet.

4. Eating a sandwich is a really good thing to do while editing. I made myself a chicken, cheese and avocado sandwich while making this clip and it was delicious. If you want to eat a salad sandwich or a corned beef sandwich by all means suit yourself. Alternatives to sandwiches can include a wrap, a burrito or a focaccia, although the focaccia fad did kind of burn out in the early 2000s.

5. Once your exo web clip is finished you have to upload it to the imaginary world I was talking about earlier aka: the internet world. While you’re there you should watch some Adam Green and Mason Ho web clips. They are the web clip masters.

Ozzie Wright