Tops, that is.

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Mick Fanning, 37, Tweed Heads, a man famous for punching a shark in the head because it tried to eat his legrope, has gone soft it was revealed today. Notorious hardman Mark Mathews of Bra Boys fame said in a press release narrated by Russell Crowe, “We suspected Mick would go soft eventually. Nobody can stay hard forever, except for maybe Hugh Hefner.” Mick reckons going soft has reduced a lot of stress in his life. “Going as hard as possible has always been my philosophy, but it turns out going soft is actually quite fun in the right circumstances.” If you’d like to go soft like Mick, visit thesurfco.com.au

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