Outrage As The Government Aims Mass Surveillance At Surfers

Your Life As A Surfer May Be Forever Changed.

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So I’m a just regular ol’ goofy footer still waiting. Over half the surfing population has had their wave pool wet dreams realised in the past couple of years as new inland right handers show up roughly every five minutes. Yet still nothing for the goofys… who also got completely screwed on the name. Goofy? What does that even mean? A quick search and I find the hopeless loser from Walt Disney and this definition: “foolish or harmlessly eccentric”. Second definition: “having or displaying protruding or crooked front teeth.” Sheeeesh that last one was actually true for a while there. True until my divorced folks put aside their differences so they could be collectively fleeced by a friendly orthodontist. That was a torturous couple of teenage years, having the mouth that looked like a broken down Decepticon and not being able to eat crunchy foods. Yep life is tough for the goofs of all descriptions. If you see one, pat them on the back, your pity will be greatly appreciated. 

Danny Johnson